Quirky Quips

It has been almost a year since we have had Quirky Quips. I really feel like I posted some, more recently, but the blog tells me otherwise. So let's not beat around the bush. Let's get right to the weird and funny things I hear around the house.

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Daisy was looking at something that June had written to Mrs. Billings.

Daisy: Murse Billings?
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Hannah was over for dinner.

Hannah: Ivory, from the perspective I'm looking at you, it looks like you have two eyes because of your glasses.
Ivory: (Looks at her curiously) I always have two eyes.
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The littles were guessing which of three sandwiches they would get.

Daisy: (Whispering) Pearl, I'll give you a hint. It's 3.
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I was showing Ivory the girls on the front of Little Women.

Mom: Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy
Ivory: Jo?
Mom: Yes. Meg for Margaret, Jo for Josephine, Beth and Amy.
Ivory: Beth for Bethlehem.
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On Christmas, Tyler pulled out a bottle of Olive Oil from his stocking.

Robyn: Is that whiskey?
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Daisy: Pearl has been pulling my nerves all night!!
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Dad: (Talking to Robyn) What eight-legged creatures do you have?
Robyn: Spiders
Ivory: Centimeters
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Tyler does not like it when I sneeze and say a word at the same time. He thinks it is weird. So I try not to do it.

Mom: (Sneezes) PLU!
Mom: I didn't say a word!!
Dad: Plu is a word.
Mom: Use it in a sentence.
Dad: My wife said, "Plu."
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Daisy: Sing a song if you like something that starts with 's' and ends with 'ider.'
Mom: (Singing) Sssssssssss-cider
Daisy: Actually, it ends with bider. Sbider.
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June noticed some crumbs on the floor while Mom and Pearl were sweeping. 

June: Mom, you left some debris. (Pronouncing it de-breeze)
Mom: It's debris. Yes, I know it has an 's,' but you don't hear it.
June: Well, you still left some debris. (Still pronouncing it wrong.)
Mom: Yes, I can feel da breeze.
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Miranda had written some stories for us, but she hadn't sent some in a while.

Mom: Miranda is having some writer's block.
Robyn: What's that?
June: It's when your hand gets stuffed up.
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I was playing Crossy Road with the kids.

Mom: I think it is time for a field. Kids, put in a good word for me.
Daisy: Give Mom the 'F' word!!"
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It was a very cold blustery day. The dog had been out a good amount of time.

Mom: Moxy will probably come in soon. It is really cold.
Pearl: I hope she doesn't dissolve out there.
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Robyn had fasted through breakfast and she was finally eating lunch.

Robyn: Every time I stop eating, there's still a hole in my stomach.
Pearl: It's your belly button.
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Daisy: What's a craft?
Pearl: It's those things that you ride on. With the logs.
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I was telling June that I need to get her pictures from the Medieval Faire.

June: Maybe while you're evolving pictures, you could get a poster board.
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(This is one of my all time favorite quotes) Tyler was in Idaho with Barry. He had this conversation and was relating it to us when he returned. 

Tyler:  Grandpa was quizzing me on how much heated water you pour on someone's oatmeal. Half a glass? A quarter cup? I said, "The right answer is that you never put water on someone else's oatmeal." Grandpa said, "That is the right answer," and he picked up the water and poured it on himself.
Ivory: He poured it on himself??
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Dad: When was the last time you used 'mirth' in a sentence?
Mom: Not often.
Dad: Why is that the automatic autocorrect?
June: Uh, my mirth is wide?
Dad: (Taking a moment) You mean girth.
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Pearl was talking about her graduation day at Itty Bitty Bruins.

Pearl: Today at school it was gradulation day.
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Daisy: I know that my remainder lives.
June: Remainder?
Daisy: Remainder. (Matter-of-factly)
June: (Looking at the hymnbook) Redeemer.
Daisy: I know that my reindeer lives.
June: Redeemer!!
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I have not been so good about writing down funny sayings recently. Hopefully reading from the quote book today will inspire me to get back on it. Funny sayings are gone too quickly.