Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Barry Cazier (1953-2015)

This post seems harder to write every moment I wait, so I'm just going to get it out there. My father-in-law, Barry Cazier, passed away on July 22, 2015 from pancreatic cancer that he was diagnosed with in Nov. of 2014. I feel honored to have known him and be part of his family. There are few people I respect as much as Barry.

It was not a terrible shock to hear he had passed away. We have been expecting it for a while, but it doesn't lessen the reality that he is no longer here with us. I am so thankful for my knowledge of the gospel and the assurance that this isn't the last time we will see him. Because of our Savior, we will all have the chance to be resurrected and be with those we love in heaven if we are faithful.

Barry was a tremendous man. He was able to mix just the right amount of humor with everything he did. I frequently laughed, but I also appreciated the wisdom that came with Barry. I have learned many life lessons from him. He was kind and a hard worker. He never gave up and he lived life fast...literally. He raced motorcycles, cars, horses (once), remote control cars, you name it. And he was good at everything he tried. He was an excellent shot, he was a trick pilot for remote control airplanes, and he was quite the golfer.

I'll remember him cheating while we played games. I'll remember his love of moose. No one can forget his liquid fudge...it was drinkably delicious. It will be strange not to have him write my kids' names on their foreheads when they visit. I'm really going to miss him. I picked out some of my favorite photos of Barry.

Going to Idaho for the funeral was a very bittersweet time. It was so nice to see family again. Jami is expecting a new addition in September and I hadn't even seen her baby bump. It is always nice to catch up with Kathryn and I really missed seeing Vicki. It seemed like a big family reunion. In fact I saw lots of Vicki's cousins that I have never seen before.

We had a special viewing with just the immediate family. We held a special FHE and let the kids ask questions and work through their emotions. (I don't really know what they are going through. I didn't attend any funerals as a child.) Later in the evening, the adults came back for the public viewing. Tyler and I were able to stand in line and thank people for coming. I was so impressed with how many people came to pay tribute to Barry. He was a well loved man.

Vicki had this amazing idea for the flower arrangement on his casket. I have never seen anything quite like it, but that is what I expect from her. Since Barry had such a love of motorcycles, she gave a tire to the florist and per her instructions, they made this. (They later added a sign that said 'Moving On'.)

The day of the funeral was wonderful. I feel like everything went as well as could be hoped for. Vicki seemed to think of everything. She had wrist corsages for the all the girls and boutonnieres for the boys.

Barry asked me to speak at the funeral. I gave the Life Sketch. It was fun to put it together and hear so many fun stories about Barry. I won't deny that I was very nervous, but luckily the wheat wheel obstructed my view of Vicki and that was all I needed to get me through. Jami spoke after me (yes...the daughters-in-law got picked on...or honored. I guess it is how you look at it.) Bro. Avondet also spoke. It was a very special service.

After the service, Vicki had gotten limousines to take us to the cemetery. It was the first time for many of us to be in a limo. Somehow the kids ended up in one limo and we adults had the other. No complaints there.

Our limo didn't have the best air conditioning (poor pregnant Jami) but we did have a mirror up above.

Kat got pictures of the kids limo. (Thank you!) They had a great time in there.

Kaysen and Robyn...hand out the drinks. (Don't worry...just water.)

Kat got a picture of us too. My only consolation for not getting a picture of her is that I took family pictures for her earlier, so I'll put those on the blog too. They have such a great looking family.

The internment was very nice too. It was a beautiful day and it was so moving to see the pall bearers carry Barry's casket to the burial spot.

It is hard to say goodbye.

But it was also a very good opportunity to talk to the kids about all aspects of death and what to expect at a funeral.

The luncheon afterward was so nice. I have never been on the receiving end and I really appreciate all the Relief Society ladies who make it run smoothly. Vicki splurged and got us Tri Tip. (It was fantastic.) We finally slowed down enough to get some picture of the girls. They were all dressed in their new clothes they got specifically for this day. (Thank you Grandma Cazier.)

The whole family.

And don't forget these three brothers. They are all fabulous men. I feel so privileged to belong to such a great family.

It was nice to relax with the girls. There is a time for seriousness and a time to smile. We did some of both that day.

I even found a way to take a picture and a selfie at the same time. Don't I look natural up there in that postage stamp?

There were so many amazing flower arrangements there. The girls and I really liked the one from BeaJo (Vicki's sister). She had a flower that resembled Gizmo (or Pip) holding a pink sock in his mouth. Fun.

We helped bring the flowers home. I promise all five girls are in there.

It was such a lovely weekend with family. Kathryn painted my nails. (She is the best nail painter in history.) We ate so much good food. The food just kept pouring into the house. So many kind people brought yummy meals. I was stuffed the whole time.

This picture makes me smile with a tear. Pip is quite the snuggler. She likes to be on people and she especially liked to climb up on Grandpa's neck. Even when he was very weak, he would still lean his head toward Pip when she curled up on him. It was nice to see her snuggle with Tyler.

There is no good way to lose someone you care about. Barry will forever hold a special place in our heart until we see him again. In the meantime, I'll wear pink socks.


meganmushrat said...

I am such a sentimental wuss. I cried all the way through this post, and I didn't even know Barry very well. I admired him tremendously, and I am very fond of Vicki (whom I know quite a bit better), but it doesn't take much to get my tear ducts in action. Thank you for your lovely rendition of how the funeral went. In retrospect, it's probably a good think I wasn't there. If I cry just reading the blog, I would have been a basket case at the funeral itself. Really - the only funeral I can attend where I won't weep will be my own!

Aubry Macbean said...

So sorry for your loss. I know we are on the other side of the country but if there is anything we can do for you guys let us know.