Photo of the week:
So, I was sustained as Relief Society President today. I can't even begin to describe how 'all over the map' my emotions have been. I was stunned by the call, but I have made my peace, and luckily I have some excellent counselors that will hopefully buoy me up.
I want to remember my first thoughts, so I will put them down here. I know that I tend to not talk about my religion in great depth on this blog. This is not because I do not believe or have a strong testimony, but simply because this blog feels like wading in the shallow end of a pool. I have fun, splash around, but I don't have to worry about getting into the deep issues. Some times I will swim out far enough to speak my piece, but I find it easier to sit on the edge, dabble my feet in the water and laugh at life.
When it comes to my feelings concerning my religion and the Savior, I tend to cry. Not because it makes me sad, but because my convictions and feelings are so strong that they touch my core; my heart. And it tends to leak out my eyes. (Trust me when I say that I could do without all the water works, but that is how it is for me.) I believe wholeheartedly in Jesus Christ and his Atonement. I believe in the prophets, past and present. I know the Book of Mormon is true. Just ask me. I'll tell you and if you can understand me through the crying, I'll tell you some more.
So naturally, I would accept this opportunity to serve. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't second guess the choice of ME. I realize that I am a good person, but I was content in believing that I wasn't President material...yet. I kinda always figured that I would be some day. (Not that I wishing and hoping for this calling, but I guess some day I thought I would feel worthy of it.) Well, who knows if I ever would have gotten around to feeling that way. The Lord didn't wait to find out.
I walked out of the Bishop's office and this is the thought that went through my head, "Well, if I am going to do this calling...this is what I want in return: My allergies to go away completely and I would like to grow a few inches taller." Let's ignore the fact that I was asking for impossible stuff and go straight to the part where I quickly rescinded that thought because it flashed into my head that I could be Relief Society president for 50 years and still not pay the Lord back for all he has done for me. And truthfully, I don't want the calling that long. Later I thought of my beautiful, healthy children, my wonderful, supportive husband, and the scripture came to mind, For of him unto whom much is given, much is required. (Doctrine and Covenants 82:3) And being the RS President is not asking that much. I am happy to serve, even if I still can't breathe that well May through July. (Seriously, I'm going to the doctor next Spring. Hold me to it.)
The good news is that I love the sisters in my ward, and since I was the secretary beforehand, I know about 95% of them. So, I am not just saying that I love the sisters in my ward because that is the cliche thing to do. (It actually kind of bugs me when people get up and say, I love all of you, and they don't even know me. I realize they are speaking in general, but still...) Nope, I really know most of the sisters in my ward, and I really like the people they are. I hope I can show these women that I love life, but I love it because I live the gospel. It sustains me.
But enough of the serious and verbose. (I did warn you.) I'm sure my blog will quickly return to the light-hearted fluff you are used to, interspersed with the quasi-serious moments. But I needed to tell you that I know my Savior lives. I know prayers are answered and that he listens. That will give me the peace I need to do His work.