Painfully Clear

I've always had back problems since college. I don't need to go into the whole story right now, but most likely it is because I was dropped on my head. (That isn't just a phrase.) My life consists of my back going out every few months and me having to deal with pain and stiffness while muscles heal and release their painful grip on my life. It is no fun, but it is part of my life and workable.

Until this year.

It all started on the 1st of January. Normal day. It was evening and I was puttering around the kitchen helping June make some strange onion tarts. I leaned over to get something out of a cupboard and my  back disagreed about the whole thing. Typical.

It was the normal tweaky feeling, but somewhere between that happening and bedtime, everything stiffened up into a mass of pain. I couldn't lie down in bed. It took me half an hour to get into bed. It was a sad state of affairs.

But even worse was trying to get up the next day. I couldn't move without incredible pain. There was no bending or sitting. It was all just pain. After an hour in bed, struggling to find a way to rise, Tyler gave me a Hydrocodon. That didn't seem to do much, but in another half hour, I was vertical, until I passed out. Then I was vertical again. It still hurt. My head was in a fog. There was cotton in my ears and everyone was speaking far away. So much crazy pain. I knew I needed to do something, so I called Jeff and he scheduled an MRI. While I waited to go in, I tried to catch a nap on the couch. I look like death.

The MRI was louder than I thought. It wasn't uncomfortable at all...just a lot of weird beeps and bangs and clanks and squeaks. I kept my eyes closed the whole time so I couldn't see how small the space was. In about half an hour, I was finished.

Here I am getting my earplugs in, and then they put a blanket over me, which is nice because it hurts to shake when I'm cold.

It wasn't until two days later, I got the results from my chiropractor. Five bulging discs, two which were basically herniated, and one torn. My back is a huge mess. But knowing what is wrong doesn't take away the pain. I moved slowly each day and everything hurt, whether sitting or standing. I could sometimes get in a somewhat comfortable position, but I could never stay anywhere for long. Pip is a good snuggler though. She doesn't care that I am broken.

On day nine, I was supposed to leave to go out of town and things were worse than ever.

I called Jeff in a panic and he ordered an epidural shot for me. It seems like shots are only for people with chronic pain, but that was quickly becoming me. Every day was just full of pain. I went in and it didn't take long to get me in. Happily, it did just what it was supposed to. Pain is gone, I was able to travel. I really am having minimal or no pain each day.

It is a huge blessing, but I know it didn't fix the problem. It is only masking the symptoms and I am nervous every day that the pain will come back and I won't be able to function.

I'm going to try several things and naturally get some advise from experts. I think this is just the beginning of the road. I just hope it is a little less bumpy for a while.