Monday, February 11, 2008

Mormon Lingo

Mormons do have a bit of their own lingo that you have to get used to if you are a convert. Growing up in the LDS faith, most of it came naturally for me, but I have heard many stories from others. My mom always talks about how she thought my Dad was taking her out to eat the first time they went to the stake center (that one is a common misconception). But Tyler had a story of his own which made me laugh, because he grew up Mormon as well.
Tyler (until he was about 15) was always wondering why people would get up and bless the speakers in the opening prayer (In this instance, Tyler thought they were referring to the microphone speakers and not the people who were asked to give a talk). People blessed them so often that he really started to ponder what could go wrong with the speakers. If they stopped working, someone might have to talk louder, but maybe the speakers could fall out of the ceiling altogether. He said he would spend a whole meeting looking at the speakers in the ceiling wondering what could go wrong with them and why everyone insisted on blessing them.
This made me laugh so hard. Changing the meaning of one word can make a world of difference. It really amuses me. Perhaps that is why I love books like Anguished English by Richard Lederer. If you have never read that one, I would highly recommend it for a good laugh. If you know of any good stories, please share.


Vieve! said...

Thats hilarious, blessing the speakers! A few years ago I realized how weird a lot of our stuff sounds, so I just have to laugh whenever I hear it!

Raging Stallion said...

Early on, I thought maybe speakers had a mind of their own, and they wouldn't repeat what the presenter was saying unless they were forced to (by prayer-invoked divine intervention).

Later, I began to wonder why they didn't bless the microphone, or the wires, or the walls, or doors, or even the seats we were sitting on! Why just the speakers? Would they suddenly fall from the ceiling, killing a dozing member? Perhaps electrical sparks would shower down upon unsuspecting irreverent persons.

Entire meetings I have sat pondering this dangerous foe clinging to the ceiling, ominously crackling every now and again--undoubtedly choosing its next victim.

My parents never asked why I concentrated so hard (on the speakers! LOL) during Sacrament Meeting. I'm sure they were perfectly content to let their rambunctious son explore the profundities of the doctrine presented in Sacrament meeting (at least he wasn't making a mess and he didn't have to go out because he was making noise).

Jerry and Vernon said...

That's so funny. I can't think of any stories of the top of my head but I'll think about let you know if I come up with one.

Desmama said...

I love that book, Anguished English. If you're a punctuation guru you'd also enjoy "Eats, Shoots and Leaves" by Lynne Truss. Excellent, snarky read!

Sharon said...

Oh maleen,

I remember wondering about the speakers as well. I LOVE your blog. Your girls are really clean for having eating frosted sugar cookies and who said Mother of the Year nomination was fake? LOVE YA BABE!